Excess Matters

live more with less

  • About
    • FAQ
  • The Edit
  • Habits
    • Outdoors
    • Health
    • Food
    • Fitness
  • Contact
Menu

My Newsletter

Let’s Connect

INSTAGRAM

  • I dare you to find a more magical place...
  • I came for the hot springs but wow these leaves were poppin’ 😍
  • HOT SPRINGS WATERFALL!! I woke up at sunrise to hike an hour up to this magical place and it did not disappoint.
  • no words for this magical birthday hike — 12.8 miles in the alpine lake wilderness with clear skies, clear water, and plenty of pika. yes, i swam in the lake!
  • This post is important to me so I hope you’ll stop scrolling to read what I have to say. . When I weighed almost 300 pounds, I struggled to walk around the block, but I did it for my health. As my fitness improved, I felt better and wanted nicer workout clothes; my cheap pants always wore out between the thighs. I coveted a pair of camo tights, but the popular athleisure store only made them up to a size 10. When I asked if they’d ever increase their size range, I was told ”that probably won’t happen” & left feeling less than. . That was 2013 & inclusivity was not yet a trend. I searched for a brand making high quality workout clothes & only one company had an ethos of empowering women of all sizes to be active. I felt like I belonged & bought my first pair of @Athleta pants. . In recent years, I’ve been lucky to work with #Athleta on various campaigns but their new initiative benefiting @nature_org is especially close to my heart. As they’ve grown, they’ve reinvested resources to make better products & become a better company. #bcorp . A few weeks ago, I finally got the camo pants of my dreams, but this pair was designed with my body & our planet in mind. I’ve been wearing the Lightning Camo 7/8 tight on runs & hikes as I make my way up the coast & they’re awesome. . To celebrate the launch of their new high peformance technical sustainable “SuperSonic” fabric, Athleta is donating $1 for every mile logged through @charitymiles app from now until 8/31. Designed to maximize endurance & minimize waste, over 6 million miles of scrap nylon yard has already been recycled. Not only that, the plus size line was redesigned paying special attention to feedback from women who actually wear these sizes. . This is where you come in. I’ve committed to 100 miles for #RaceThePlanet and I’d like to challenge you to get outside and log your walks, runs, or hikes too. If moving your body to protect our public lands and water is not enough, I’m also giving away an Athleta outfit like mine. . To participate, visit the link in my profile & anytime you log a walk, run, or hike, post the image to your feed or story & tag me so I can keep track of entries. I’ll select a winner 9/1.
  • I have some wishes to share with you... ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve had a lot of unfollows since going AWOL, and that’s fine. I started this account to document my #weightlossjourney, the #keto/#paleo/#whole30 meals I was eating, overcoming #bingeeating, and all the different #workouts I tried in pursuit of an elusive goal. Food. Losing Weight. My body. These things took up 90% of my thoughts for 90% of my life. And now they don’t. . I still love food and enjoy being active. I still care about my health and have things to say on the subject, but even a shift toward #foodfreedom or #bodypositivity in every post is still a focus on food + body that no longer feels authentic. Transitioning to a #vanlife account isn’t my intention either. I don’t want to be in a box (never have, never will), I just want to share #brookelife and the algorithm has no idea what to do with me. . I was feeling really frustrated with @instagram a few days ago. In the bigger picture, I don’t really care about likes and views, but I do care about having an impact, so when I see a post tank, it’s demotivating. . Yesterday I was reminded of why this app is so powerful — it connects us to one another and fosters real, meaningful relationships. I met Whitney in SF through this app and over the years we’ve kept in touch, sharing meals, workouts, laughs, and now a chance encounter in a national forest. It’s funny how the universe works, bringing us together when we most need it. . And oh yeah, my wishes... . 1️⃣ If you care about seeing the things I post, please reply to my stories, leave a few words in the comments, share with a friend, or tap the save button. It helps me and the algorithm know what matters to you. 2️⃣ If you don’t care about seeing the things I post, please UNFOLLOW. Not mute, unfollow. No hard feelings. 3️⃣ If you live near any of the areas where I’m traveling, please let me know! I’m on the road alone and while I enjoy my own company, I would love to meet new friends along the way.
  • I’ve been on the road for a few weeks, and there are many things I could have only learned by doing, but what I already knew was that I still have too much stuff. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Isn’t it interesting how our things give us an illusion of security or comfort? Mother nature and I have Marie Kondo’d my belongings repeatedly yet I still have 16 pairs of shoes and 29 books in a 20’ camper van. They all bring me joy, but utility? Maybe not. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I didn’t plan this or jump in with a life-changing experience in mind. Sure, I am excited for the adventures, but my struggles persist alongside rugged mountain vistas and alpine lakes. One day I’ll tell you how I ended up here, but it wasn’t in pursuit of #vanlife. I just took a leap of faith and this is the net appeared. I said yes. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve been feeling a little lost, unsure of where I’m going or what I will find. Logistically, I want to go north and explore the PNW, maybe cross over into Canada before heading to Montana, but the places themselves are backdrops. What I really want is to sit down and write, to pick up my camera, to tell stories. Consistently. The concept haunts and evades me but I’m not giving up. Thank you for giving me space to practice, your messages encourage me to keep sharing. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ My first weeks on the road took me through the Sierra’s and back to San Francisco, Marin, and Sonoma. I saw my doctors, friends (hi @threebabes, @dandelionchocolate, @hidden_rhythm, @emilywillowjewelry, @thebonnielouu ), and ran out of gas in a whole foods parking lot. @alltea_allshading helped me sew new curtains, which I’m particularly proud of. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve spent many nights in the forest with no service and it’s kind of nice to wake up without the buzz of notifications or morning scroll, but it also feels important for me to stay connected. I’m working on finding a rhythm. If anyone has recommendations must-see places (hikes, art, food) in Oregon, Washington, Vancouver, or Montana, please share! And if you live in any of these areas, I’d also love to meet you.
  • Recovering perfectionist reporting live from Las Vegas. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve been thinking about how I can reframe the notion that I lfailed” to post 3-4 times this week. I try not to subscribe to the concept of failure because I don’t think it’s helpful, but I also think it’s important to hold myself accountable. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I am not the best with consistency or discipline (surprise, surprise 😉) and these are two things I’m committed to improve. For me, they’re tied into perfectionism — a trait I’ve long outgrown, but can’t seem to shake. I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about what I want to do and not enough taking action. I get caught in “perfection paralysis” and the belief that I don’t have the right photo or words to express myself how I’d like to. And these things are true — my photos are not as beautiful and my words aren’t as clear or impactful as I see them in my mind, but to let those things prevent me from taking action is to prevent myself from the practice that will get me there. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I could tell you that this wasn’t a “normal week” but nothing is normal in my life. I spent the first half of the week in the mountains — it was a full 20 degrees cooler which made it more comfortable to work on projects. I slept soundly and hiked through the desert. The landscape has changed from only a month ago when the desert was blooming with bright pink and yellow flowers. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I put in a fancy new outlet with USB ports and forgot to bring the tools needed to patch several holes. I installed hardwood floors in May but I’ve been dragging my feet on finishing the trim. I got halfway done before realizing that I left too large of a gap in some areas and need a new solution. The perfectionist in me gets super frustrated with these roadblocks and wants to give up (#ALLORNOTHING) but renovating this RV has been an opportunity to push through that. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I tried a few new classes @trufusion_bluediamond and @redemptionfitnesslv and I’ve been thinking about what I can do to improve my upper body strength and flexibility. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Went to Celestia last night & it’s amazing to see what the human body is capable of with persistent practice.
  • I’m really bad at dating apps. And dating in general, honestly. The last guy I dated asked me if I always made it so hard to be loved and adored. Not intentionally, but probably. I’ve never been easy. It’s never been easy. I have so many hang ups and fears and insecurities around men. But really it’s been about my body and what men will think of it. And under that, what I thought of it. I was paralyzed by the belief that my body was wrong. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Internalized fatphobia with zero compassion and so much shame. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As we unwind this cultural stigma, I struggle to fully embrace the body positivity movement — I just don’t buy what’s being sold. The idea that we should love our bodies no matter what sounds nice, but it feels like another unrealistic ideal. Can it be enough to accept and respect our bodies as they are? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I started this post to share about adding this photo to my tinder profile and how it felt like an internal revolution. How it marked a shift — a newfound freedom of not loving or hating my body, not scanning it for where I might shave off an inch or two, but settling into the idea that this is me, and this is my body, unapologetically. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I still have work to do. WE still have work to do. I don’t have the answers but how incredible is it that our bodies have now become a topic we are able to discuss without shame? Grateful for #fatactivism and body positivity for giving us new perspectives and space to breathe.
  • I’m an expert grocery shopper. I know this is not really brag-worthy, but here we are. I love good food and I love saving money and I’ve gotten really good at optimizing for both. I think my tips can probably help you too so I’m starting a series where I show you how I shop and build meals around the weekly sales @wholefoods. I typically spend $50-60/week and try to make things that are both simple and tasty. This is my tiny #solarpowered refrigerator with part of this weeks #groceryhaul (i’m still in transition) — head over to my story + blog to see all the chocolate I’ve stashed in the door and more details on what I’m cooking this week. Are y’all into this idea? #whatsinmyfridge (left to right, top to bottom): - blueberries, tangerine, plum - frozen green soup (recipe on my blog) - bell peppers - avocado - @good_culture cottage cheese - green onions, cilantro, parsley - @siggisdairy whole milk yogurt - grass fed ground beef - broccoli - lacinato/dino kale PS — I’ve been dealing with anxiety and trying to keep my head above depression this week. I naturally turn inward when I’m feeling low but I’m trying really hard to consistently share 3-4 times per week regardless. Thanks for your patience and encouragement as I find a rhythm.
  • I woke up at 5am filled with excitement — the past few months I’ve been renovating the RV, sneaking in a few days of adventure here and there, but TODAY is the day I am hitting the road for real. I have so many little things to do before heading out tonight, but wanted to say hi and thanks for all the love and support on my last post. This is the face I make when I feel anxious but happy (still working through discomfort in front of a camera). I hope you do something scary but exciting today too. Xx
  • Plot twist. I sold most of my belongings and I’m hitting the road for the rest of the year. This is my little solar-powered home, ready to carry me on adventures, hiking, writing, and photographing the most beautiful places I can find. My mom doesn’t worry as much when I’m active on social media and a good friend told me I seem happier and healthier when I share. I haven’t because I often overthink what I might post here. I feel like it needs to fit inside a box that I’ve outgrown. A box that occupied most of my thoughts for most of my life, regardless of body size. I’m sure it’s just fear. Fear that my value is tied into my body, the same fear that told me I couldn’t truly live my life or be happy until I was thin. I don’t believe that fear, but doubt still creeps in. There’s a lot to learn and unlearn in this journey but perhaps the most important is that we can love and accept ourselves through the process. Thanks for being here with me as I grow. Xx
  • About
  • The Edit
  • Habits
  • Contact

Excess Matters

live more with less